I stopped making new years resolutions a long time ago when I realized that it takes more than trying to turn over a new leaf, acquire new (better) habits, or resolve to accomplish more than the previous year. These resolutions are not bad action plans. However, most of us do not carry them out for very long before we lose sight, get discouraged or find road blocks that keep us from accomplishing them. And usually, this happens because we made the resolutions and tried to work them out from our own ideas and plans.
I learned through the death of my son, that "our plans" do not always turn out according to what we want or desire. When you want to die but can't, and don't have the strength to take the next step; when you're consumed with grief and anguish of heart and soul, you have to find help to get through the next moment, much more to the next day. Although I had been a Christian and in the Scriptures for years, it took a tragedy for me to know my great need of God. It was a different need than I had ever experienced and a perspective of God never known before. I have a saying, "Desperate times causes us to see our desperate need of God."
God says, "I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the LORD. Jeremiah 29:11-14NIV
Another version says of verse 13, "Then (with deep longing) you will seek Me and require Me (as a vital necessity) and (you will) find Me when you search for Me with all your heart" (Amp). Yes, vital necessity.
Sometimes those plans are not what we imagined, or the prosperity not which we expected, or the future how we envisioned it. I have learned that God's thoughts are not my thoughts or His ways my ways, but God's ways are higher as is His thoughts. (Isaiah 55:8-9). He knows best and that is sometimes a hard lump to swallow when you lack understanding.
I do know this: The plans for me are to not waste my precious grief. The lessons learned through grief are more valuable than any new years resolution I could ever imagine. The peace of God, and that is a gift, is more than I can describe. The strength He gives me daily is unexplainable but I know I've been granted it. The comfort.......well, it's not just so that I can sit around and be comforted. I have to pass it on to another hurting soul that they may experience the same comfort that I have received (2 Corinthians 1:4.).
I ask this to be my goal for the rest of my life: "I instruct you in the way of wisdom and lead you along straight paths. When you walk, your steps will not be hampered; when you run, you will not stumble. Hold on to instruction, do not let it go; guard it well, for it is your life.
[ABOVE ALL ELSE], guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Keep your mouth free of perversity; keep corrupt talk far from your lips. Let your eyes look straight ahead; fix your gaze directly before you. Give careful thought to the paths for your feet and be steadfast in all your ways" (Proverbs 4:11-13 & 23-26).
Above all else, fixing my eyes on Jesus, "who is the Author and Perfecter of faith" (Hebrews 12:2).
Blessings for the new year!
Saturday, December 30, 2017
Wednesday, December 20, 2017
TRUE LOVE
In conversation with a young man who is struggling to understand that God loves him, I explained God's love in a way that he could grasp and know it for a fact. I told him of how much I loved my son; that I would always try to do my best to meet his needs, raise him to be a responsible person all while pouring out my love to him. And that if God had given me the choice, I would have died for my son that he could live and enjoy a full life. The love of a good mother for her child is great. It is a love that is "as strong as death" (Song of Songs 8:6 NIV).
"God is love" (1John 4:8). He is the meaning of love and all that He is and all that He's done and all that He will do. He loved us so much that "He (greatly) loved and dearly prized the world, that He (even) gave His (One and) only begotten Son, so that whoever believes and trusts in Him (as Savior) shall not perish, but have eternal life" (John 3:16 AMP). And Jesus, who was without any sin, took our sins; all the grotesque, horrible, dreadful, shocking and even petty sins on Himself on the cross so that we could have His righteousness (free from guilt or sin)! What other god would do that for you? NO OTHER! Only Jesus. His blood is precious and washes away our sin. His love surpasses all knowledge and nothing can separate us from His great love (Romans 8:38-39). He is Immanuel, meaning, God with us (Isaiah 7:14). He is "KING OF KINGS AND LORD OF LORDS" (Revelation 19:16 NIV).
I heard the words from a Christmas song the other day ....."God in His mother's arms." Just wow!
Mary loved her Son deeply but the love of God for His son is indescribable. There is nothing, not even my example of love for my son, that can compare to God's love.
Another amazing truth comes from Jesus prayer to His Father in John 17:23 AMP., "...That the world may know (without any doubt) that You sent Me, and (that You) have loved them (us), just as You have loved Me." To think that God loves us even as He loves Jesus is amazing.
Trying to help my young friend understand this love from God, has reminded me and reinforced the truth of how much we are all loved. My response to this love, that is beyond comprehension, is a life of gratitude, service and love back to the One "who loved me and gave Himself up for me" (Galatians 2:20 AMP).
What great love is this? A saving love. A perfect love. True love. Thank you God for the indescribable gift of Your Son. The true meaning of Christmas.
Merry Christ-mas
"God is love" (1John 4:8). He is the meaning of love and all that He is and all that He's done and all that He will do. He loved us so much that "He (greatly) loved and dearly prized the world, that He (even) gave His (One and) only begotten Son, so that whoever believes and trusts in Him (as Savior) shall not perish, but have eternal life" (John 3:16 AMP). And Jesus, who was without any sin, took our sins; all the grotesque, horrible, dreadful, shocking and even petty sins on Himself on the cross so that we could have His righteousness (free from guilt or sin)! What other god would do that for you? NO OTHER! Only Jesus. His blood is precious and washes away our sin. His love surpasses all knowledge and nothing can separate us from His great love (Romans 8:38-39). He is Immanuel, meaning, God with us (Isaiah 7:14). He is "KING OF KINGS AND LORD OF LORDS" (Revelation 19:16 NIV).
I heard the words from a Christmas song the other day ....."God in His mother's arms." Just wow!
Mary loved her Son deeply but the love of God for His son is indescribable. There is nothing, not even my example of love for my son, that can compare to God's love.
Another amazing truth comes from Jesus prayer to His Father in John 17:23 AMP., "...That the world may know (without any doubt) that You sent Me, and (that You) have loved them (us), just as You have loved Me." To think that God loves us even as He loves Jesus is amazing.
Trying to help my young friend understand this love from God, has reminded me and reinforced the truth of how much we are all loved. My response to this love, that is beyond comprehension, is a life of gratitude, service and love back to the One "who loved me and gave Himself up for me" (Galatians 2:20 AMP).
What great love is this? A saving love. A perfect love. True love. Thank you God for the indescribable gift of Your Son. The true meaning of Christmas.
Merry Christ-mas
Wednesday, December 13, 2017
YOU ARE NOT ALONE IN GRIEF: Finding Strength Through The Holidays
"God makes a home for the lonely." Psalm 68:6 NASB
My third book on grief was published in 2018. The very first chapter in the book addresses the overwhelming impression that we are alone. Loneliness is one of the most distinguishable aspects of grief. Our loss is a personal journey that, at times, causes us to feel isolated and alone. Perhaps, forsaken.
During the holidays, this loneliness can creep into our hearts as we watch others excitement while enjoying their families. I'm not suggesting we are not thankful for the times with our loved ones. I'm saying the absence of our loved one, who is no longer with us, seems at a greater degree when we are gathered together. I've caught myself looking around at everyone during our family gatherings with the keen awareness that my son is missing. Someone is missing.
We may be doing better and then comes the holiday's bringing with it fresh grief. Especially if this is the first season without a loved one. The firsts are always tremendously hard but not necessarily the hardest.
Of all the emotions we go through with grief, one very important truth to remember is this: You are not alone. First and foremost, God is with you. His Word describes Jesus as our Great Shepherd and we are the sheep. The Shepherd cares for His sheep continually, never leaving them alone because they are so needy. "He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart" (Isaiah 40:11 NIV). He tenderly cares for those who are sorrowful, who have collapsed under the weight of grief.
God is a "Father to the fatherless, a defender of widows" (Psalm 68:5 NIV). He is our compassionate,
all-sufficient Savior and His grace is always, not sometimes, but always sufficient to take care of us. He knows the pain and sorrow of watching His only Son take the sins of the world on Himself and die on a cruel cross to save us. Since He loves us that much and understands our pain, we can rest assured He is constantly with us. He will not leave us alone.
Secondly, There are other sufferers who understand your pain. I'm not saying they know how you feel. No one knows that but you and God, but you have those who can truly understand your pain; those who walk in the shadow of death, our sojourners in grief who share our sorrows. Sojourner means "temporary journey." God promises "I WILL NEVER (under any circumstances) DESERT YOU (nor give you up nor leave you without support, nor will I in any degree leave you helpless), NOR WILL I FORSAKE or LET YOU DOWN or RELAX MY HOLD ON YOU (assuredly not)!" (Hebrews 13:5 AMP). He also promises that He will wipe every tear from our eyes. "There will no longer be death; there will no longer be sorrow and anguish, or crying, or pain" (Rev.21:4 AMP).
Be encouraged this Christmas season. Take heart, fellow believer. We have a good Father and are headed home where we will be with Him and our loved ones......forever!
YOU ARE NOT ALONE
My third book on grief was published in 2018. The very first chapter in the book addresses the overwhelming impression that we are alone. Loneliness is one of the most distinguishable aspects of grief. Our loss is a personal journey that, at times, causes us to feel isolated and alone. Perhaps, forsaken.
During the holidays, this loneliness can creep into our hearts as we watch others excitement while enjoying their families. I'm not suggesting we are not thankful for the times with our loved ones. I'm saying the absence of our loved one, who is no longer with us, seems at a greater degree when we are gathered together. I've caught myself looking around at everyone during our family gatherings with the keen awareness that my son is missing. Someone is missing.
We may be doing better and then comes the holiday's bringing with it fresh grief. Especially if this is the first season without a loved one. The firsts are always tremendously hard but not necessarily the hardest.
Of all the emotions we go through with grief, one very important truth to remember is this: You are not alone. First and foremost, God is with you. His Word describes Jesus as our Great Shepherd and we are the sheep. The Shepherd cares for His sheep continually, never leaving them alone because they are so needy. "He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart" (Isaiah 40:11 NIV). He tenderly cares for those who are sorrowful, who have collapsed under the weight of grief.
God is a "Father to the fatherless, a defender of widows" (Psalm 68:5 NIV). He is our compassionate,
all-sufficient Savior and His grace is always, not sometimes, but always sufficient to take care of us. He knows the pain and sorrow of watching His only Son take the sins of the world on Himself and die on a cruel cross to save us. Since He loves us that much and understands our pain, we can rest assured He is constantly with us. He will not leave us alone.
Secondly, There are other sufferers who understand your pain. I'm not saying they know how you feel. No one knows that but you and God, but you have those who can truly understand your pain; those who walk in the shadow of death, our sojourners in grief who share our sorrows. Sojourner means "temporary journey." God promises "I WILL NEVER (under any circumstances) DESERT YOU (nor give you up nor leave you without support, nor will I in any degree leave you helpless), NOR WILL I FORSAKE or LET YOU DOWN or RELAX MY HOLD ON YOU (assuredly not)!" (Hebrews 13:5 AMP). He also promises that He will wipe every tear from our eyes. "There will no longer be death; there will no longer be sorrow and anguish, or crying, or pain" (Rev.21:4 AMP).
Be encouraged this Christmas season. Take heart, fellow believer. We have a good Father and are headed home where we will be with Him and our loved ones......forever!
YOU ARE NOT ALONE
Thursday, December 7, 2017
COMPARISON - The act or process of comparing
COMPARISON - The act or process of comparing
"Each person should live as a believer in whatever situation the Lord has assigned to them, just as God has called them." 1 Corinthians 7:17
Lately I've been in a slump. Every now and again I hit that slippery slope and spiral downward into feeling sorry for myself. It usually happens when I start comparing my life to my friends and others my age. I watch them with their children and grandchildren and listen in on their conversations about their family and how wonderful it all is. They are so proud of those grandchildren and tell the funny and cute things they are doing. The thing is, I would be doing the same thing if I was a grandmother, so I'm not criticizing or being cynical by any means. I truly am happy for them. It's when I start comparing that the sin of self-pity raises its ugly head and starts eating away at my contentment. Oswald Chambers said that "self-pity was of the devil." Elizabeth Elliott said, "to hell with self-pity" because that's where we can trace the source.
The verse from 1 Corinthians above is sometimes difficult and impossible to live out, especially if I'm wallowing in the unfairness of the sorrows of life. I have to find a way out. Usually, I disconnect for a while, even from social media, anywhere or anything that can be a seedbed for planting self-pity.
There's only one way out of this state of mind and heart and that is to take refuge in my Savior. Since He has allowed my life to be what it is, I have to believe that He wants to use it somehow for His purposes. The challenge is to trust Him to lead and guide me in the path that He has assigned and to find joy in Him, not my circumstances.
So, as I take the next step, I know my God has the power to bring up His feeble child out of the pit; from being turned inward, into looking up - fixing my eyes on Jesus. I will take a step away to re-focus and find strength through solitude, quietness and prayer and through the words that speak from the Scriptures. This is the only way out.......I know from past times.......lesson learned.
"Each person should live as a believer in whatever situation the Lord has assigned to them, just as God has called them." 1 Corinthians 7:17
Lately I've been in a slump. Every now and again I hit that slippery slope and spiral downward into feeling sorry for myself. It usually happens when I start comparing my life to my friends and others my age. I watch them with their children and grandchildren and listen in on their conversations about their family and how wonderful it all is. They are so proud of those grandchildren and tell the funny and cute things they are doing. The thing is, I would be doing the same thing if I was a grandmother, so I'm not criticizing or being cynical by any means. I truly am happy for them. It's when I start comparing that the sin of self-pity raises its ugly head and starts eating away at my contentment. Oswald Chambers said that "self-pity was of the devil." Elizabeth Elliott said, "to hell with self-pity" because that's where we can trace the source.
The verse from 1 Corinthians above is sometimes difficult and impossible to live out, especially if I'm wallowing in the unfairness of the sorrows of life. I have to find a way out. Usually, I disconnect for a while, even from social media, anywhere or anything that can be a seedbed for planting self-pity.
There's only one way out of this state of mind and heart and that is to take refuge in my Savior. Since He has allowed my life to be what it is, I have to believe that He wants to use it somehow for His purposes. The challenge is to trust Him to lead and guide me in the path that He has assigned and to find joy in Him, not my circumstances.
So, as I take the next step, I know my God has the power to bring up His feeble child out of the pit; from being turned inward, into looking up - fixing my eyes on Jesus. I will take a step away to re-focus and find strength through solitude, quietness and prayer and through the words that speak from the Scriptures. This is the only way out.......I know from past times.......lesson learned.
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